“I can’t believe so-and-so got into that college. Well, I mean, they’re X minority, so that probably helped…”

“I couldn’t get into that school. They hardly take any white kids.”

These are comments I’ve heard friends make. Adults won’t be so explicit, but they’ll shrug and say, “Come on. You know that colleges want diversity.” 

Students, parents and even teachers described race with a shocking callousness. But as senior year and the admissions process has gone on, the disrespectful way in which we often talk about race and admissions is still shocking, but no longer surprising.

I can understand confusion about how uncontrollable factors like race and legacy status affect admissions. I’ll listen to questions about how effective affirmative action practices have been or whether holistic application reviews are the best ways to admit students.

But I will not put up with comments that might give some people a sense of reassurance by dismissing other students’ hard work.

As an Asian-American, I’ve had friends suggest that the college process is easier for me since I’m a minority, and I’ve had other friends assume, since Asians are not underrepresented minorities, that I’m sympathetic with flippant speculation about how somebody’s race may have benefitted their application. 

Underlying a lot of these discussions is an assumption that students of underrepresented minorities have it easier in the college admissions process due to holistic application reviews. Most colleges will consider who the applicant is as a person beyond just grades and test scores. And yes, race counts as part of a holistic review.

But race won’t make or break an application. We are all Lab Schoolers. We have the same teachers. We have the same counselors. We take the same standardized tests. We all have extracurricular opportunities that come with going to Lab. 

Ultimately, chalking up a decision to something a student has no control over is demeaning, especially when being part of a minority ethnic group in the United States comes with its own set of challenges. 

So as college decisions start pouring in over the next few weeks, think carefully about whether and how you should talk about race in the admissions process. Are you engaging in a fair discussion about the admissions process, or are you going behind someone’s back to knock down their achievements?